Wednesday, September 8, 2010

What an Odd Way to Market Mansion Floor Plans

"Mansion Floor Plans by Donald A. Gardner Architects"
Donald A. Gardner Architects Inc.

"If you are ready to build a new personal castle or mansion, we have designed an impressive collection of luxury and mansion floor plans for you. Donald A. Gardner Architects strives to create elegant sanctuaries with its mansion floor plans, each bearing enhanced features throughout its space.

"A great disparity exists between what is considered essential in luxury in mansion floor plans and what is essential in smaller home plans. This should not create a breach in practicality for luxury and mansion floor plans. Donald A. Gardner Architects believes your luxury mansion house should be the best of both worlds: the right mixture of extravagance and pragmatism to create a mansion floor plan of your dreams...."

So far, so good: an assurance in the first sentence that this firm has been around the block a few times and knows what they're doing; somewhat high-tone phrases like "great disparity" and "breach in practicality."

Then, below these well-crafted paragraphs, pictures and links to eight standard 'mansion' plans - the sort of thing you find on the grocery magazine rack, with titles like "500 House Plans You Can Build."

If you don't like the first set of eight cookie-cutter castles, the page's navigation suggests that there are 55 more sets to go.

Maybe the Lemming is missing something here, but even with the architectural firm's assurance that they'll add personal touches to their prefab plans: this doesn't feel like the sort of "personal castle or mansion" I'd want, if I had the budget for something like that.

Well, the Lemming isn't in that economic class - not even close - so I probably wouldn't understand.

And that's okay: I can still have fun, looking at the pictures, and daydreaming over the floor plans.

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