Want to be Paranoid, but Just Can't Find the Time?

Create Your Own Conspiracy Theory

Just fill in the blanks and push the button: this could be a great time-saver for people who want to be paranoid, but just don't have the time.

Here's what I came up with, after filling in the blanks:

"What They Don't Want You to Know

"In order to understand gravitation you need to realize that everything is controlled by a group of Shriners made up of Lithuanians with help from auto mechanics.

"The conspiracy first started during Battle of Thermopylae in Davenport, Iowa. They have been responsible for many events throughout history, including signing of the Magna Carta.

"Today, members of the conspiracy are everywhere. They can be identified by their slurping coffee.

"They want to strike OSHA and imprison resisters in Point Barrow, Alaska using unicycles.

"In order to prepare for this, we all must vote. Since the media is controlled by radical environmentalists we should get our information from "deficit hawks" of the Democratic Party."

For those of us who don't take conspiracy theories all that seriously, this bit of online software could yield a few minutes of fun.