Either Bigfoot hunter Tom Biscardi and Searching For Bigfoot, Inc., bought a rubber Bigfoot suit, or they've discovered something truly amazing: a living organism that's hollow, made of flexible polymers, and has no DNA!
Either way, they're famous.
Tom Biscardi showed the world a close-up photo of what he insisted was Bigfoot's teeth and tongue in a news conference last Friday. He was in Palo Alto, California, at the time. The frozen Bigfoot, in an ice-filled freezer, seems to have been in Georgia at the time.
Matthew Whitton, a Clayton County police officer, and car salesman Rick Dyer, disappeared after they got paid for the frozen gorilla suit. Which I think shows a great deal of good sense on their part.
On the other hand, Mr. Whitton is out of a job. The 28-year-old Georgia cop had been on medical leave, after being shot in the wrist.
Con Man or Stoned? Either Way, He's FiredPolice Chief Jeffrey Turner said, "He's disgraced himself, he's an embarrassment to the Clayton County Police Department, his credibility and integrity as an officer is gone, and I have no use for him," which is not the sort of thing you want to hear your boss say.
The police chief seems puzzled, too: "This turn of events from hero to someone who defrauds a nation is just baffling. I don’t know how he got from one point to the other," (Atlanta Journal-Constitution) but I can offer a possible explanation. Wrist injuries can be painful: maybe Mr. Whitton took a few too many pain-killers, and really thought that he had seen three Bigfoots (Bigfeet?) in the north Georgia woods, and had a Bigfoot body in the freezer.
Now that the nation - and the world - knows that they bought a rubber Bigfoot, Searching For Bigfoot, Inc., is doing a good job of - clarifying? - their position.
From 'It's Bigfoot!' to 'We'll Sue' in Under a WeekAfter buying a block of ice with a rubber gorilla suit inside, Tom Biscardi and his Searching For Bigfoot, Inc., organization aren't happy with their purchase. As CNN put it, "...Biscardi's organization, Searching for Bigfoot Inc., 'is seeking justice for themselves and for all the people who were deceived by this deception.'... "
In their position, I might not be so eager to keep reminding people that I told the world Bigfoot was real, and bought a rubber costume to prove it. But then, I'm not a Bigfoot hunter.
Even before the "Bigfoot" hair sample failed a DNA test, there were (subtle?!) indications that something might be less than right with the Georgia duo. For one thing, they were advertising $499 USD Bigfoot expeditions, and were also looking for
- The Loch Ness Monster
- Jimmy Hoffa
American Law Protects the Innocent: Not the StupidThat's the opinion of a talking head on one of those 'what do you think about this' panel discussions. I feel a little sorry for Tom Biscardi Searching For Bigfoot, Inc., but not all that much.
Didn't they see anything a little dicey about a couple of Georgia good 'ol boys who would go on Bigfoot expeditions for $499 a pop, and were on the lookout for leprechauns and Elvis, too?
I think the biggest clue that Biscardi and company missed was that the two fellows wanted their money before the buyer had a chance to examine the carcass.
I Could be WrongOn the other hand, the two Georgia men could be honest. Maybe
- They disappeared from their hotel room because Bigfeet (Bigfoots?) kidnapped them
- Biscardi got a rubber gorilla suit because Bigfoots (Bigfeet?) recovered the body of their fallen comrade, putting a Halloween costume it its place
- Bigfoot leaders don't want their presence known because
- They are gentle children of nature, wanting nothing more than to live in peace and harmony with Mother Earth
- The Bigfoot Emperor's plans to enslave humanity aren't quite ready
Georgia Bigfoot in the news:
- "American 'Bigfoot' is monkey suit "
BBC (August 20, 2008)
- " 'Bigfoot' was rubber gorilla costume"
Reuters (August 20, 2008)
"No wonder Bigfoot failed a DNA test...."
- "Cop could face sack over Bigfoot hoax"
Melbourne Herald Sun (August 20, 2008)
- "Bigfoot's body a hoax, California site reveals"
Atlanta Journal-Constitution (August 19, 2008)
- "Bigfoot claim a fake, ex-enthusiast says"
CNN (August 19, 2008)
- "Researcher says bigfoot just a rubber gorilla suit"
Associated Press (August 19, 2008)
- "Georgia men defend Bigfoot body claims"
CNN (August 15, 2008)
Update (August 21, 2008):
"Georgia Bigfoot Hoax: Rube Duped by Sophisticated Humor? " (August 21, 2008)