Friday, December 10, 2010

Mr. Basler's Worst Men's Fashions, 2010

"Manure couture: worst men's fashion"
Robert Basler, Oddly Enough blog, Reuters (December 10, 2010)



"Okay, we all had our laughs yesterday at the year's worst women's fashions.

"Today's topic, awful new men's fashions, is a bit more personal and painful.

"After all, I have to wear this stuff myself to set a good example, as you can see in the photo above of me and my brother at our grandmother's recent funeral.

"This was a year when we were treated to outfits too embarrassing to describe, knowing full well that we'll all be wearing this stuff by spring. Heck, there won’t be anything else for sale...."

Whether due to the psychological trauma of reviewing men's fashions of 2010, or some other factor, Mr. Basler's list numbers but eight.

As with his review of women's couture, Mr. Basler's list is in the familiar reverse, or countdown, order: from number eight, "I see you've been shopping in Paris, Lamar," to "Twice the shame, twice the idiocy…:"

The Lemming is, once more, transfixed by an array of visions given form by an international agglomeration of designers. From what hidden garths and fissures of a designer's mind came theses inspirations?

Consider, for example, the young man at your left in the adjoining paired photographs. He might be suitably cast as a member of the Jets in a West Side Story remake. By what arcane process did a designer come to the conclusion that this fellow should wear a dark floral print shirt: and what appears to be a calf-length skirt?

As for the chap wearing - a suitcase and an accordion? Words fail the Lemming.

Then there's what Mr. Basler calls the "rube tube." It's - - - orange.

And unsuitable for outdoor use during Minnesota winters.

Mr. Basler may be right, speculating that the orange see-through cummerbund is intended for overweight middle aged guys - who want something to hold in their bellies on the beach. And, of course, are color blind and devoid of aesthetic judgment.

Orange?

See-through?

Again, as the Lemming asked in a micro-review of Women's fashions: Why?!

One two demented designers, having momentarily eluded their handlers: yes, that could explain the occasional see-through orange cummerbund or accordion-suitcase ensemble. But this cavalcade of dandified detritus! How do these refugees from some moonstruck realm get so many others, in so many places, to take them seriously?!

Like this amazing thing. Mr. Basler said, in "Just head for the sea, Lee, and dress like the Klan, Stan…," that this outfit was: "Everything the stylish, happenin' white supremacist needs for the beach."

With respect to Mr. Basler's standing as an expert on fashion, foil wrap, and antlers: Another explanation is possible, in the Lemming's opinion.

This creation, with its seemingly haphazard juxtapositions of robe, cross, and motorcycle goggles, might be our first glimpse of another Hollywood remake. For the summer of 2011, movie-goers might be treated to an action-packed adventure based on two films of the seventies: Inquisition and Mad Max.

Or maybe a designer fell asleep while watching The Birth of a Nation.

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3 comments:

Brigid said...

Yikes.

Oh, and typo: "One two demented designers"

The Friendly Neighborhood Proofreader

robert basler said...

Just for the record, as my item pointed out, the Rube Tube isn't orange. It's a new color called crapricot which is sort of orangey looking, but more manly.

bests,
Bob Basler

Brian H. Gill said...

robert basler,

Thank you for correcting and clarifying my identification of the Rube Tube's color.

Of course! It's "crapricot ... orangey looking, but more manly."

And, thanks for the two lists of - memorable - fashions.

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