Rules for Dating a Daughter

" Ten simple rules for dating my daughter"
Smile of the Day (April 11, [year not specified])

This is an updated version of a gag I first saw many years ago. It's none the worse for all the years it's been traveling around.

This one starts: "Rule One:
"If you pull into my driveway and honk, you had better be delivering a package; because you sure are not picking anything up."

My favorite may be Rule Nine, which starts, "Do not lie to me. I may appear to be a potbellied, balding, middle-aged, dimwitted has-been; but on issues relating to my daughter, I am the all-knowing, merciless God of your universe. ..." A bit of megalomania there, perhaps, but as a father who has experienced three teenage daughters, I can sympathize.

Enjoy.