Short on Excuses? Want Software to do Your Thinking?

"Holiday Party Excuse Generator"

Funny, and surprisingly G-rated for a service of this sort. Well, maybe PG.

It's apparently possible to send what you come up with. I can't recommend that, but it's fun to choose different options, and see what comes out.

These are two messages I got:

"Dear [name],

"I am overjoyed that I will be unable to attend your chi-chi holiday wingding. I will be meeting with the leaders of Free world, and thus in a more celebratory frame of mind. Once the holidays are past, I hope to have a good long visit with you and find out all the party highlights. Please give my tepid regards to your party guests, and tell them I said, "better you than me." My best wishes for a blithe and bourbon-soaked holiday.

"Hugs and Kisses,
[name]"

"Dear [name],

"I am beyond delighted that I will be unable to attend your spiffy yuletide shindig. I will be auditioning for a community theater production of "Cats", and thus unavailable for you to bore with your insipid palaver. Once the holidays are past, I hope to have a chat with you. Please give my heartfelt hisses and sneers to your party guests, and tell them I believe life's really dark moments never fail to built character. My best wishes for a truculent and tawdry holiday.

"Adios, [name]"